Best practices for Bystanders

Reporting abusive content

Reporting harassment on social media platforms or websites can help to take that content down faster. This is a good reason why it is helpful to engage other people in this process. On our storytelling platform, bystanders can receive help requests to report content on social media. People experiencing online harassment may include links to the abusive content so you can directly help report it. They can also add usernames or hashtags.

We have created these Online Safety Guides that break down how to report harassment on each platform.

Documenting

Documenting harassment can be triggering and exhausting experience for those that are going through it. You can help people experiencing online abuse by monitoring abuse, taking a screenshot on your computer, cell phone, or a similar electronic device, and then writing down:

The specific date and time of the harassment
Which platform you found it on (ex. Twitter, YouTube, etc.)

On our platform, people experiencing online abuse are encouraged to include what platforms they would like people to help them document harassment, whether there are any hashtags, content, mentions, etc.

The more details and information you provide the person being harassed, the more useful it will be if they need to take action in the future. Learn more about the importance of documentation here.

The Power of Messages of Support

Sending supportive comments

Online harassment can make people feel alone and isolated. Sending a supportive message is a great way to let someone who is hurting know they are not alone. It can be hard to know what to say sometimes.

Speak from the heart!

Personable messages almost always make people feel loved. If you feel comfortable, feel free to share your own experiences.
Consider comments like, “I’ve got your back” or “You’re not alone.”
Oftentimes people have trouble understanding why online harassment is happening to them, and they secretly worry that they did something to deserve it. Reminding them that “You don’t deserve this,” or “I know this harassment feels personal, but these remarks have nothing to do with you and everything to do with the person saying them” can help.

Need help figuring out what to say? Here are some examples to get started.

“No one deserves to be treated that way.”
“I am sending you love and support during this difficult time!”
“I admire you for getting through this and having the courage to share your story.”
“Sharing your experience can be very scary – thank you for trusting us enough to be vulnerable. We’ve got your back!”

Sometimes validation that what’s happening isn’t OK can help.

In these cases, you can try: “What this person said to you is not OK. I’m so sorry you’re going through this.”

Before you send a message, read it over and ask yourself:

“Would receiving this make me feel better?” If the answer is yes, press “submit!”

Avoid any “coulda, woulda, shoulda” language.

Even if you mean well, comments on what people could have done, or should do, can make them feel like they did the wrong thing or “asked for it” in some way.